wrangled and wrinkled.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Goodnight ___
Goodnight moon
Goodnight bear
Goodnight 'coon

Goodnight bee
Goodnight hive

Goodnight wind

Do not sleep you sail my ship.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

I've done all I can to be productive.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

I'm still waiting for it to hit me. When is this lack of inspiration going to catch up with me? Was I made for this?

Yesterday, I can honestly say was one of the best days I have had since I have been back. Yes, I realize that I should be getting to my philosophy homework. I went to Indianapolis, with no plan and some friends. Jess, Jesse, Me, Casey, and Janie. Thanks for letting me get away and realize what I have again. It is great to have these days that you remember AS you are actually having them. Days that you try so hard to revel in and take count of your blessings. It's really simple to have them, and when you do, they are groundbreaking. It sounds dramatic, but I am so thankful for life, friends, simple things, music, undiscovered places.

When you are seemingly down and out, days like that pop out of no where, and remind you, that you are a fornuate person. And when you feel like you don't matter, and you've had bad days...Conversation. No idle words, just activity.

Thanks for making me go!

Friday, September 23, 2005

Come on. Lay it on me.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

What is it like to be so inspired but so artistically fruitless? Ask me.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

"Can we afford to educate everyone?" / "Can YOU afford to be educated?"

Something I was thinking about today after reading Descartes views on Skepticism. Why am I allowed to think like this? Why am I so priviledged to be able to pay for a school and sit in a room and discuss whether or not I actually exist? Meanwhile the regular Joe is pumping gas, using each paycheck for food, rent, or an addiction to cigarettes.

Is there a society where everyone can achieve this kind of education? Or should/can we afford (monetarily or otherwise) to educate everyone? Or does there have to be this hierarchy of people? An eternal caste system and litmus test to specialize our communities and fellow man.

In order to move forward and to gain, there has to be some kind of conflict right? So Marx (Was it Marx who came up with the conflict theory of human kind) in his thinking was right...Oh I called a communist right. But, stay with me...His whole idea on Conflict theory (if I am getting this right) was that there has to be some kind of conflict to get anywhere, without it, no one would fight (literally) for anything. There would be no hostile conflict to take over governments who mistreat people and so on and so on.

So does our world revolve around this constant attainment of "more"? In order to get more of anything you have to work and get something to barter for something else. So much revolves around money. To get money is to get education, or at least the opportunity for it. Think about it...When is the last time you heard a story about a national scholar from the University of Compton or U of Spanish Harlem. What I am getting at (by naming some of our more destitute areas) is that those people do not have money, therefore cannot afford to think of anything else but surviving day to day.

Is this a bad thing? That we can't educate our poor? Or does it create that hierarchy I mentioned to keep the conflict of attainment moving?

I feel selfish for being able to learn sometimes. Should we keep our system to it? Or would that create a intellectual complacency? Ok, I am switching my major to philosophy.

Monday, September 19, 2005

Huge storm! Biggest one of the year. I like storms during the day, you can see what's really going on. They are good at night, but nothing beats a warm morning or afternoon thunderstorm. It's bright out now, but still windy.

So we'll see how printmaking goes today.

And now for some wisdom via Rod Stewart:

"A big bosomed lady, with a Dutch accent, who tried to change my point of view." - Rod Stewart

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Other than sketching, today was my first really work hard day. It felt so good to open an ink can and smell that oil based etching ink. I worked in the print lab most of the day as a T.A. I helped 3 or so people with their etchings, taught them how to bite a plate and ink a plate to run printer's proofs off. It felt good to help people.

Then for the second half, I painted in the painting lab. I had to finish a painting I started during the summer. I got some of Jess's water based screen printing ink and applied that. The colors were so vivid. I don't think that is possible with oil paints. I guess maybe I don't really know how to use oils proficiently yet. I will get there.

Friday's senior seminar class went great. Portfolio reviews are good, but standing for an hour and a half wasn't. I was really encouraged to see what I worked so hard on (even though being called a work-aholic) get praised. I also got great input from my professors. It is finally good to achieve that after feeling like I muddled around for the first 2 years here amidst professors who didn't like my work. Vindication! It's really not that dramatic.

Also this weekend, I realized the extent of grace I receive. I realized why I suffered so much my first year at Akron. I see now the wisdom I have gained. Nothing until that year about my life was ever hard. Praise the Lord for strife and the redemption from it. I suppose now I can fully realize His blessings. A family, friends, confidence, love etc.

Friday, September 16, 2005

First post from a new computer.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

This is not rhetorical: Have you ever wanted to take something back?

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Sick as a dog.

You know, I have never really understood the whole "naming of inanimate objects" idea. Ok, so pets are good to name, and everyone knows that. Although they are animate. I sound like a hypocrite because yes I know, I have named my car. It goes beyond that. I can see (because I did) why people name their cars. They are active when we make them active. They are transportation etc. Same with ships and boats.

But really, do we have to nickname our computers? Or our cell phones. It gets a little annoying after awhile.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

The art building is closed today? Do they know we started school a while ago? I heard something about how they had to train the T.A.'s or hire them or something like that. So today is kind of dedicating to reading, sketching and maybe cleaning up a bit. I really want to vacuum in here, but I can't remember if we have one in this house. I read some really good quotes in my film book, so that is going well. Then I took a break to take a nap, but before I went to bed last night I drank a half a liter of water + 3 cups of tea. So now I am reaping the benefits of that.

That reminds me of the time I drank 2 liters of water within 30 mins. That was not pretty. I thought my urethra going to be scorched to oblivion.

I guess I am going to clean up now, and then get back to reading.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Sometimes I feel so old.
"Got to be free like the leaves of Autumn."

Friday, September 02, 2005

Ripped from the pages of "Seymour an Introduction" (J.D. Salinger) Please read every word and you will finally know what it is like to be me.

"...in English, a Sick Man who not at all seldom, though he's reported so childishly denies it, gives out terrible cries of pain, as if he would whole-heartedly let go both his art and his soul to experience what passes in other people for wellness, and yet (the rumor continues) when his unsalutary-looking little room is broken into and someone-not frequently, at that, someone who actually loves him-passionately asks him where the pain is he either declines or seems unable to discuss it at any constructive critical length,

and in the morning when even great poets and painters presumably feel a bit more chipper than usual, he looks more perversely determined to see his sickness run it's course, as though by the light of another, presumably working day he had remembered that all men, the healthy ones included, eventually die, and usually with a certain amount of bad grace, but that he, luckily is being done in by the most stimulating companion, disease or no, he has known."

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Read this Foxtrot:

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/uclickcomics/20050901/cx_ft_uc/ft20050901

Packing my stuff has proven more difficult than planned. Each year I force myself to take less. Then half way through packing I decide I really probably want those cut outs from a 3 year old issue of NME. I am going to paste them on my wall back at school. Then I take the t-shirt which I don't want but should take in case I need a red shirt and in case the person who gave it to me wonders why I don't wear it much (thanks Danielle). I need that copy of that Joan Jett and the Blackhearts record just in case I want to blast "Crimson and Clover" out the window at girls. So really I only pack things I really need, to annoy other people with. Like those green Hulk Hands in the corner. Now if you'll excuse me, I have more pre-planned annoyance to attend to.